Premiere by Tracy EwensPublished October 21, 2014 by Fastpencil Inc.
Genre: Contemporary Romance
Rating: 1 Star
Reviewed on February 16, 2015
She didn’t know what to say. It certainly wasn’t going to be, “I loved you, and when you left it broke my heart.” That sounded pathetic. Peter was still staring as if all she needed to do was spill her heart to him and that would fix everything. Sam knew better.
“Sam” Cathnar is a natural problem-solver and organizer, who loses herself in details and planning. It makes her fit to be the assistant creative director for the Pasadena Playhouse.
Four years ago, she was struggling with her professional and personal life. She followed her dreams and failed miserably. She traveled and experienced in the “real world” until she eventually returned home, a home without her best friend Peter, who had left her unwanted, used, and broken. She fell apart after him and stopped holding onto a possible future with him.
With Peter’s temporary return to their hometown, she can’t help that her eyes give away what she keeps hidden: despair, betrayal of a lifetime of friendship, failure, hopelessness, the bad memories, the good memories, love. However, no matter what he sees or thinks, she’s convinced she doesn’t care for his apologies or explanations. She won’t dwell in the past because she realized already how naïve and hopeless she was all those years ago. In present time, she doesn’t want anything to do with Peter anymore nor does she need anything from him— except his play production to save their hometown theater.
The Good: Emotional turmoil. Out of many examples: It was touching that she went to see his first play in New York. I was shocked and overwhelmed with sentimental feelings and it was like I was there with her, feeing what she felt. Also, I like the Tell Me Something I Don’t Know game.
The connection between them doesn’t rely heavily on a sexual component. For once, we have a male lead who doesn’t think about banging the female lead every five minutes. It can get annoying in books and I’m glad Premiere isn’t one of them. It’s a love story, not a fuck-me story.
Sam told Peter to fuck off. Okay, she didn’t say those exact words, but she stood her own ground and told him “No. We’re not doing this again. You can’t handle it. You’ll get tired again and run off and I’m not about to be discarded and left behind again.”
You go, girl.
It didn’t matter what Grady did all those years ago. Peter still left. You make your bed and you sleep in it. This was good for Sam. Even though she moved on and rejected Peter, she knew what she wanted for herself. Which only led her to realize she was also a coward. Cue revelation. Cue happy ending.
The Bad: I was constantly confused about who was saying what. It was fucking frustrating. The lines and povs need to be clarified.
Too many repeated monologues— inner or spoken— so I skipped over those. There are chunks in Premiere that can be left out because the story was way too repetitive.
At the start, I liked where Sam’s mindset was at when it came to Peter. Reading about her, I imagined her saying in my own words: “You don’t get to walk away. You don’t get to leave then waltz back into my life. You don’t get to come and go as you please. It’s not fair to me. It’s not fair to everyone you left behind.”
And then Sam got tiresome and bitchy.
I thought I would like Sam. I really did. I mean, she was “rational” and “fresh” for a while. Then she became whinny and hysteric. She drove me mad. She drove Peter mad. But I don’t even care about Peter, so no, he doesn’t count. SHE DROVE ME MAD.
She was an on-and-off push button. She chewed out Peter one minute then was calm the second minute then wailing in the next then back to calm then back to being angry then back to smiling then— You get it.
Here’s a visual for you if you don’t get my picture of her mood swings:
She was like an annoying buzzing alarm clock you wanted to smack, or the neighbor who won’t turn down their music and shut the fuck up with their chattering for one day.
She was grumpy, which made me grumpy, and I hate that. But grumpy, I get. Raving lunatic who lost her cool, I don’t.
Her meltdown. WHOA. What the fuck?
Sure, she had some emotional baggage, but really? When it came to this point, I had to stop reading, drop the book for one day, and get a good night sleep. I understood why she acted the way she did; I strongly didn’t support it. Peter was putting their life on stage as a biased play, in her opinion. He was putting her on display and she hated the fairytale version of herself, of him, of Grady, of their life. I get it, but I was fed up with her. Peter was okay. His character was consistent and clear, non-vexing too. Truly, Sam’s character was a problem. I couldn’t even pin her personality. Who the hell was she? She was conflicting and such a pain.
Present’s Sam and Peter was mind-numbing stupid, more stupid than Past’s Sam and Peter. I sympathized with their stories . . . until I didn’t. I almost gave up on them. I was at a 25% mark when I started fighting my way through the book, trying to give the story a chance, trying to give the couple the benefit of the doubt. I don’t even know why I pushed myself. I’m exhausted. Nobody should have to feel exhausted after finishing a book. Truth be told, I was passed the 50% mark when I began skimming a lot, due to unnecessary repetitions and inconvenient breakdowns in the story. It became more about getting myself to the end rather than rooting for the couple and rejoicing in their HEA. Premiere started out nice, but now I want my life back. If you want to read a wonderful romance book about second chances, this isn't one of them.